I have recently been feeling like my body is at war with my soul. My chronic neck pain and tension headaches have been at an all time high. When episodes like this come on, I don’t sleep well, wake exhausted, and sleepwalk through my workouts (if they happen at all). If you’ve ever dealt with chronic, unexplainable pain, you know it can be extremely challenging to be positive and feel gratitude through it.
Then yesterday, I lost my voice. I am not entirely sure if it was allergies, a cold, or just the last nail in the coffin (sorry, that’s morbid), but I am currently voiceless. I can’t sing along to my Broadway Musical playlist. I can’t talk to my coworkers. But most importantly, I can barely do my job. Being in business development with change makers all over the country, I have to be able to get on calls to walk prospects through proposals, or introduce them to our agency. Simply put, it is not a good first impression to speak to a possible partner sounding like I’m on the edge of death, so those had to be rescheduled.
And then something unexpected happened as I was squeaking at one of my co-workers. I felt a wave of gratitude. While it is exhausting to lose my voice, I know it is coming back. And for many people, that is not the case.
The past few weeks I became so consumed with throwing myself a neck-pain-pity-party – my own personal shindig without music, fun, friends or booze (okay, maybe a little booze?). And while singing “Let it Go” at the top of my lungs, directed at my muscle tension, I had lost sight of all of the parts of my body that have been working for me every minute of every day – including my voice, up until now (confession: it is quite possible I lost it singing Frozen). I might have been in pain but at least I could talk!
So today, even without a voice and a tweak in my neck to rival the result of a car wreck, I am grateful for my body: My two legs that move my forward; My two arms and hands enabling me to communicate this to you (and receive a much-needed hug at the end of the day); Even my toenails that have remarkably held to my self-pedicured nail polish for three weeks without a chip.
What can you be grateful for, right now, in this very moment?
What is working for you, even in the wake of certain things not working at all? Take a moment to be grateful and focus on those things, and throw yourself a different kind of party – one the rest of the world would want to join.